Session Notes

Husbands and Wives: Reconcilable Differences

Never having learned how his needs should be met while growing up, Mark looked elsewhere, finding comfort in an on-again-off-again affair with another woman.

This is an encouraging article about setting limits to nurture your marital relationship.

Husbands and Wives: Awful to Awesome: Restoring Broken Relationships

expectations that went both unmentioned and unfulfilled. Lysa emphasizes having open and honest conversations about expectations, saying, “You cannot possibly meet the expectations of another person if you don’t know what they are.”

This article offers a good prayer on God rebuilding you so you can unselfishly focus on the needs of your mate.

What to Do About Halloween: The Pumpkin Gospel

How do we become a new creation when Jesus comes into our hearts? (We learn to love Him more; we’re no longer filled with yucky stuff; we become God’s children.)

This is a great idea to teach children that God wants us to show others the depth of our love for Him.

Husbands and Wives: How to Be a Great Mentor

Care for them. When you meet, simply ask the two mentoring questions, “What are your priorities?” and “How can I help?”. Then relax and enjoy the relationship.

What to Tell Your Children about Love, Sex and Relationships: Themes to Discuss With Your Child 0-3 and 4-7 We practice modesty by not barging in while our brother or sister is getting dressed. You can set an age when this should be in full practice — 4-year-olds may not be ready, but a 6- and 7-year-old should practice this at home.

What to Tell Your Children about Love, Sex and Relationships: Connect With Your Eyes, Your Touch and Attention

When I was a new mother, David Gatewood told me that to connect with my son I needed to look him right in the eye attentively when he was talking to me, touch his hand and be sure to let him know that I heard him. When you’ve had a long day that is a hard lesson to follow. But I’ve seen it work. My son knows when I’m really “with him” and when my mind is wandering.

What to Tell Your Children about Love, Sex and Relationships: Self-Concept Is Critical

Abandoned little girls will seek an unsuspecting boy to fill the void in their heart. Angry young men can become emotionally distant to protect themselves from pain — never letting someone close enough to have their heart.

What to Tell Your Children about Love, Sex and Relationships: Key Messages We Want Our Children to Remember

Boys and girls are both excellent; you are exactly as God wanted you

Saving It For Marriage

Part of the maturation process, especially for men, is becoming capable of providing for a partner and a family. The bible has some sobering words about financial responsibility.

Crosswalk.com – Accepting Our Children

as I raise my kids, I don’t want to acknowledge their success as much as their effort. And I don’t want to acknowledge their effort as much as their being created in the image of God.”

Is Your Son Glad to Be a Boy?

Before your son reaches puberty, start teaching him to treat girls and women with respect. Establish a clear set of guidelines long before he starts dating. Model respect in your own marriage.

Is Your Son Glad to Be a Boy?

“I submit that men tend to emphasize values such as discipline, power, control, stoicism, and independence.

Is Your Son Glad to Be a Boy?

My son had the saddest look on his face when he came home from school today. I asked him what happened. He says his teacher doesn’t like any of the boys in his class. She has repeatedly reprimanded my son for being too rambunctious. Now, he’s deathly afraid he is going to fail second grade.”

Focus on the Family Magazine: Fighting Fair

Touch. Hold hands. I don’t know why, but this position softens the heart. It makes us vulnerable to each other instead of making us feel like kung fu fighters. We are more willing to be reasonable and caring than win at all costs when we hold hands. We’ve stuck with the holding hands approach because we like what it leads to: praying together.

TrueU.org | Focus Institute: An Invitation to Question

Why would you believe in and follow a God who could be blown away by the slightest philosophical breeze?

This piece offers a few good points on being unafraid to question the God of mystery, who by His very nature invites debate.

READY FOR TAKEOFF?

Andrew was looking for truth: truth about God, truth about God’s promise of personal change.

This article is a good example of trusting God. One doesn’t need to know everything about Him, just enough to believe what he says is true.

TrueU.org | Student Lounge: In Defense of the Punt

This is because we come to the conversation from different contexts and with different personalities and motivations (you could also use the word “agendas,”

This is a relatively good article as it discusses the importance of refraining from putting words/ thoughts in others mouths. No one has this right or to assume someone’s motivation.

The Benefits of Family Hobbies: Why Family Identity Matters

My friend with the grown kids says they remember their outdoor adventures as an antidote to the teen culture. Looking back they say, “We were never tempted to drugs or drinking because we had tasted the high of nature and the mountains, in the context of family love.”

It offers excellent points to foster family bonding.

TrueU.org | Lecture Hall: How Spiritual Disciplines Work

one does not simply engage in a one-time act of dedication to the master-teacher. To “present one’s body” to a golf instructor requires repeatedly engaging specific body parts in regular activities done over and over again,

Interesting perspective, as submitting each aspect of your life to Christ rather than just confessing sin.

Helping Too-Busy Teens Beat Burnout: Stressed Out

List all the activities you’re committed to — daily, weekly, seasonally, occasionally Divide them into 3 groups: essential, important and pleasurable Beside each, write down something you must say “no” to in order to make that item a priority. Take your time and be honest.

Helping Too-Busy Teens Beat Burnout: Stressed Out

List all the activities you’re committed to — daily, weekly, seasonally, occasionally Divide them into 3 groups: essential, important and pleasurable Beside each, write down something you must say “no” to in order to make that item a priority. Take your time and be honest.

Evaluating Your School District’s Sex Education Program: Participation in the Process

Attend meetings with suggestions of possible curricula, studies and supplemental materials that support your views and desires for the sex education program.

Challenge your committee to give parents as many choices for their child 
  as possible in this most sensitive subject.

Husbands and Wives: When Spouses Don’t Agree About Church

Individuals feel like they didn’t “fit in” at the church they attended. B. They felt confused or overwhelmed by church expectations. C. They felt rejected, humiliated, or hurt by someone in church.

This is a basic article on Biblical support for overcoming church conflicts and commtting to a one.

The End of Courtship: Part 1 of 3

early sexual satisfaction makes love and real intimacy less, not more, likely — for both men and women.

Some of the ideas in this article seem out of date but it is interesting to see the reasons for the decline of courtship.

Ask Theophilus: Caught!

“Ask Christ to scour out every stain of dishonesty, of excuse-making, and of self-deception from your heart. Ask Him to make you not only honest, but in love with honesty. That is the kind of prayer He loves to hear.”

Only the first article has any real value.

DATING: IT’S A PURE THING

While we give God many areas of our lives, too often we rely on ourselves to find true love. Yet if we’re truly living our lives for God, we must give Him our love life as well. God wants us to be pure for our future spouse. So if you decide to date someone, make sure you’re strong enough spiritually so that God can lead the relationship.

Some Good basic points and boundaries, especially for teens.

Who Am I Reflecting?

I realized he wasn’t telling me to break up with a girl because he was mad at me or that he didn’t want me to be happy. He was telling me because he didn’t want me making the same mistakes.

There are only a couple good points. One of which learning from your parent’s mistakes is a blessing.

Lessons from a Bear of Very Little Brain: The Place of Children’s Literature in Education

“the seminal ideas of Plato, Aristotle, St. Augustine, St. Thomas, only properly grow in an imaginative ground saturated with fables, fairy tales, stories, rhymes, romances, adventures-the thousand good books of Grimm, Andersen, Stevenson, Dickens,

It has a good point on reflection. We should not approach literature as what we can get out of it, like a lover. This will not create love.

Teaching teens to look for who God is and what His world is really all about through helping her understand that reading the Bible is having a conversation with God. As she reads, she can look for things that apply to her own circumstances and place in life.

The quest for truth.

Personal time with God.

Putting God’s Word into perspective

Preparation for Renewing Their Minds

TrueU.org | Lecture Hall: The Meaning of Meaning: The Politics of Reader-Centered Interpretation

A brilliant commentary on post-modern, feminist literary analysis demonstrating that its logical conclusion is that, “No,” no longer means, “No.”

Focus on the Family Magazine: Desert Places

If your spouse is in the midst of a trial, cling to God and try to understand more of what your partner is feeling.

This is an encouraging resource of how to pray when in a spiritual desert place.

Three Essentials to Worldview Training

If it can’t be proven by science, then it cannot be considered definitively “real.” I followed his comment with: “Is justice real? How do I prove that?” This is why God’s Word is the source of all primary truth. Because it speaks to all the questions about who God is, who man is, what is right and other core questions of human existence, the Bible must always be the defining reference point for all primary truth.

Help Your Teen Develop a Biblical Worldview

If the sheer persistence of these messages forces us as parents to teach our teenagers how to think about life and learn to filter messages for themselves, then we have given our young people the ability to think critically. And, hopefully, our teens also will be trained to defend their faith in a world increasingly hostile to family values and Christian faith.

This is a key value in selecting a school for your children.

XXXchurch.com X3 Operation Save The Kittens

In all of the years I have worked to assist people addicted to erotic and/or pornographic materials to walk free, this has to be one of the most blatantly unhelpful sites I have ever been presented with.

Think about it for a moment: We do things we shouldn’t for two reasons — we have not had our needs met in legitimate and effective ways and we always do whatever it is we are told not to do.

The fact that we are doing things we are told not to do — things which we know are less then beneficial for us — causes us to feel shame. Shame causes us to avoid community with other people and with God (The two places God created for us to have our needs met) and, so, our needs then can not be met in a legitimate manner.

The above reality has been known since the early days of Freud and most legitimate Christian counselors (Those who are not simply secular therapists who happen to be Christians) are trained in such from the first weeks of their training.

Why then does the Christian church insist on continuing to use/play off of unmentionably stupid tactics of blatant shame (Every time you masturbate, God kills a kitten) as a means of arresting undesirable behavior when they know full well that it is this shame that caused the problem to begin with?

A pastor I know mentioned a few weeks ago that he had confronted one of his colleagues — a man who had been in his graduating class — with this reality. He had asked him why, if he had been trained in the same seminary and had the same knowledge of grace, did he continue to preach shame and condemnation from the pulpit?

The second pastor’s response, though it put him in a significant amount of distress, was strikingly honest. He said, “Yes, I know all that but, if I ever started to preach that grace, how would I control my flock?”

I have to honor that second pastor — that sort of honesty can be worked with. So few Christian leaders are that self aware.They wouldn’t be able to stay that way if their congregations woke up though.

Healing of any brokenness starts when we admit that we can’t get free, that we don’t even want to be free, that we kinda like our addictions and then we ask one more critical question: “I wonder if there is someone out there who can love me — not as I should be — but just as I am.” (Yes, Billy Graham had it right all along…)

When we finally begin to seek love instead of hide in the shadows and seek performance (Which we will never attain no matter how hard we white-knuckle it…) we have begun to take the first steps out of our brokenness and the first steps towards a ABBA who has the power to so deeply meet our needs that we will never want what we were settling for — never again.

The opposite of white-knuckling is grace — and grace is freedom.

Dear Susie — Music, Courtship, Dating and Spirituality

But don’t let the media or your friends determine what’s normal! Only God can determine normalcy. God looks at you as His princess. He’s totally in love with you. In fact, He smiles every time you come to His mind . . . which is constantly!

Boundless: Kiss Me Now

“And just as we should not draw hard lines between sexuality, spirituality and real life, we cannot separate the mind, soul and body. Our soul doesn’t reside in some cavity in our chests, it is woven throughout our flesh. Because of this unity, when our spirit joins in prayer with another’s, an emotional bond is formed. In the same way, our lips cannot do something without it affecting our soul.”

This is a stunningly balanced article detailing, among other things, the difference between lust and love and how God calls engaged couples to a deep and passionate movement towards oneness on spiritual, emotional and, within limits, sexual ways as they move towards marriage.

Boundless: The Dating Game: The Dangers of Cash-Based Courtship

“Bailey writes that until the beginning of the 20th century, dating as we know it did not exist. If a man wanted to get acquainted with a woman, he came calling at her parents’ home. He sat on the porch or in the parlor, drank lemonade, and perhaps listened to the young lady play the piano — all under the watchful eyes of her parents.”

This author has come to the rather strange conclusion that, as a result of the socio-cultural shift from a courtship/arranged marriage model to a dating model, women have essentially become prostitutes forced by guilt to perform sexual and emotional favors for the finances that have been spent upon them. The assumption, therefore, is that a great many of the trends towards sexual promiscuity etc in our society are the result of such — ignoring the reality that the underlying causes of sexual promiscuity usually have much more to do with a child’s need for love then with money spent upon them.

This article has value — but only in that it could cause a woman to rethink any feelings of indebtedness sexually — not as any sort of well-reasoned reevaluation of dating.

Husbands and Wives: Successful Marriage

This article contains a series of questions about marriage that must be addressed now, before Satan has an opportunity to put his noose of discouragement around your neck. Set your jaw and clench your fists. Nothing short of death must ever be permitted to come between the two of you. Nothing!

Husbands and Wives: Couples in Crisis

“Now we begin to see why groveling, crying and pleading by a panic-stricken partner tend to drive the claustrophobic partner even farther away. The more he or she struggles to gain a measure of freedom (or even secure a little breathing room), the more desperately the rejected spouse attempts to hang on.”

A direct and somewhat blunt assessment of how we further damage weakened relationships.

Husbands and Wives: Lifelong Love

Remember, the dating relationship is designed to conceal information, not reveal it. Both partners put on their best faces for the one they seek to attract. They guard secrets that might be a turn-off. For anyone contemplating marriage, here are seven straightforward recommendations that will increase the chance of living happily ever after:

Some very solid advice about dating and picking a mate that can actually meet the dreams of your heart. Key focus: Dating a Christian must be a non-negotiable.

Talking to Your Child About the Facts of Life: Get a Vision

“These kids are way too young to be thinking about dating. That’s why we’re allowing you to date at 17.” Or, if you have decided that courtship is the best option for your child, you might say: “These kids are way too young to be thinking about dating. You’re free of that stress because you’re waiting for the husband/wife God has for you.”

Reparative Therapy of Male Homosexuality

Dr. Joseph Nicolosi writes a stimulating assessment of the individual attempting to change his or her sexual orientation — a group he feels hs been neglected by the mental health profession in its attempt to support the liberation of gays. In it he details how, in its attempt to support the liberation of gays, the mental health profession has pushed underground another population. Because it no longer categorizes homosexuality as a problem, it has cast doubt on the validity of the struggle to get free of a homosexual orientation.

Challenges in the Teen Years: Dating vs. Courtship

This is the most direct answer Dr. Dobson has, as yet, given to the entire Josh Harris model in which, he both addresses the fear that dating has become a training ground for the absence of commitment and yet still states:

“Many parents, and undoubtedly the majority of teenagers, would consider the courtship model to be extreme and terribly restrictive. Not every teenager would tolerate it. I believe it’s a good idea in those settings where both generations are committed to it and are willing to work together to make it successful. Courtship is not recommended in cases of adolescent rebellion or where there is great resistance to the idea. Whether or not to take this approach is a matter for individual families to determine.”

Three part interview (Josh Harris, Part 1)

Joshua Harris is probably one of the most controversial authors of our time in that he created either instant delight or instant disgust in the majority of North American evangelicals. While his attempt to arrest a culture of sexual exploitation is valid, his methods are highly suspect.

Harris is essentially an extremely simplistic and legalistic author (Though he has taken great pains to paint himself as the opposite of such.) His writings are highly reactionary and tend towards black and white thinking shunning altogether as invalid any legitimacy in the need of adolescents to learn how to form romantic attachments.

He tends to see any emotional pain of early relational formation/disintegration as without any redeeming qualities and blindly insists that it should be natural and normal to have absolutely no physical intimacy prior to the wedding day.

It is worth noting that the results of studies on groups of young people who have followed this type of approach are beginning to come in. At this point, the results are not fully in but, while this approach appears to delay the onset of sexual activity about 18mo, it seems to actually result in higher levels of it later and a willingness to participate in extreme high-risk activities such as unprotected anal intercourse.

This is one author we cannot recommend. Invariably, we have seen that when an individual approaches a normal relational bonding process with this degree of fear and rigidity the result is either no relationship or a shame based relationship. People simply cannot bond within the parameters he defined — as he mostly admitted a number of years ago before the entire YC youth convention in Edmonton — and not even his wife would fully go with his theories for their own relationship. Because they cannot bond within this structure, they bend the rules to make it happen. This leaves them with the relationship they desire — and false guilt or shame.

When a person attempts to form a bond intended by God to be shame free (Genesis “Naked and unashamed”) under this level of legalistic rigidity, the inevitable result is a damaged bond of intimacy. As with all things, attempting to fight one imbalance with another never results in balance. Rather, it simply polarizes and fans the flames of chaos.

Husbands and Wives: Creating Intimacy and Friendship in Marriage

A wife’s loving companionship was designed by God to meet her husband’s number one relationship need. Evaluate your level of intimacy with your husband, then consider whether you might have been neglecting your husband’s needs for affection, comfort,

It is a good foundation article.

Teaching Kids to Be Kind: Show Kindness to Siblings

Do not deny your child’s feelings, but help him learn to express emotions in an appropriate way. If you see your child acting jealously, encourage him identify the emotion by saying, “I understand that you feel bad because …” or “I know you hurt because.…” Helping your children figure out the causes of their actions will help them learn how to deal with problems in the future.

Some good points to pray.

Teaching Kids to Be Kind: How Teachers Can Teach Kindness

You are completely safe in this room. I would not permit it. Do you want to know why? Because it hurts when you do things like that to others.

It isn’t the best example. However it raises some good basic points.

Teaching Kids to Be Kind: Kindness and Friendship Go Together

Constantly remind your kids how important they are. When they blow it, put your hands on their shoulders, look them in the eye and say, “You are too important to be making those kinds of choices.”

Healthy Friendships: Avoiding Cliques and Accepting Others

Discourage an attitude of superiority. 3. Read books that present the message that everyone is unique and has something valuable to offer. 4. Ask your child to reach out to a classmate who is playing alone at recess or eating by himself at lunch.

Healthy Friendships: Nurturing Your Child’s Self-Confidence

nvolve your child in socially interactive activities, such as sports or music. • Encourage your child’s friendships. Throw birthday parties and invite one of her friends over for dinner every other week

Healthy Friendships: Healthy Friendships

Compassion. By teaching your child to understand the hearts of others, she will be more likely to offer sensitivity to those who are hurting or needy.

Weekend Magazine – Family Bed Feedback

Are you truly doing it because you believe it is in the best interest of your child, or could it have more to do with your own emotional needs?

Bedsharing With Infants: Bedsharing With Infants

“Back-to-Sleep,” which encourage parents and caregivers to reduce the risk of SIDS by putting infants to sleep on their backs, should be broadened to promote what appears to be the safest possible sleep environment: a firm surface, as found in a properly designed crib; no sheets, comforters or other materials covering the baby’s face; and a solo trip to Slumberland.

TrueU.org | Truth Lab: Pooh Bear

This is a classic misunderstanding of the difference between moral boundaries and legalism. (No, the two are not synonymous in spite of the years of abuse of the topic.) Yes, God gave us total freedom in Christ and, yes, not following Him is still stupid as well. When we try and balance both rules and grace we end up in an internal conflict because they can not be balanced against each other — they are in opposition.

Ethics do have a place in Christianity — but their place is not in some misguided tolerance or lessening of condemnation under a reclaimed law. It is in the realization that anyone who is living in legitimate grace would have such a hunger to be near the ABBA that they love that they could not even think of violating another and justifying it. Such can still be fully held in a new order where condemnation and the law that created it are FOREVER DEAD.

(License is not grace — it’s legalism reconstituted as the rules have to be there to make breaking them make sense.)(Soft legalism is still legalism though…)

Learn and know about the needs of your children. Individuals learn in a variety of manners. Some are very visual, others are very auditory, and still others need physical touch and movement to learn best. Get to know your child’s learning style and do what you can to make your teaching technique and environment match that style.

The Secret to Your Child’s Academic Success : The Secret to Your Child’s Academic Success

The Secret to Your Child’s Academic Success: The Parent Factor and the Peer Factor in Education

The Secret to Your Child’s Academic Success: Parenting Styles and Academic Success

The Secret to Your Child’s Academic Success: Education Options & Priorities

The Secret to Your Child’s Academic Success: Practical Ways to Show Acceptance

The Secret to Your Child’s Academic Success: Practical Ways to Build Firmness

The Secret to Your Child’s Academic Success: Checklist for Priorities

The Secret to Your Child’s Academic Success: Checklist of Constraints

The Secret to Your Child’s Academic Success: Checklist of Constraints

The Secret to Your Child’s Academic Success: Where to Go from Here

Anxiety of the Uninitiated

They assured me that marriage would be a lot better if sex was something I shared only with my spouse.

Although I do not agree with everything in the article it does talk about the lies that the Enemy gives us particularly about sex.

Pulling a Ruth, Part 2

I knew that as much as I wanted Steve, I wanted even more to be in God’s will. So I prayed that God’s plan included Steve — and if it didn’t, that He would change the desires of my heart.

This is a fantastic sequel to the first article in setting limits on friendship to encourage men to step up from friendship to courtship.

Pulling a Ruth, Part 1

We had a great time on the drive up and even seemed to be connecting in the midst of the larger group while sightseeing. I was beaming, thinking, surely he’s getting it now. He must see the chemistry here.

This is an interesting article on developing a friendship and prayer for a woman to show interest.

Dinner and a Movie

‘m not sure what’s worse: falling for a great guy but having no idea where the relationship’s headed or having no prospects in sight. Both are frustrating. And both leave you feeling no closer to marriage than when you started.

This article could offend as it discusses the danger of sharing to emotional deeply before a commitment.

Dinner and a Movie

‘m not sure what’s worse: falling for a great guy but having no idea where the relationship’s headed or having no prospects in sight. Both are frustrating. And both leave you feeling no closer to marriage than when you started.

This article could offend as it discusses the danger of sharing to emotional deeply before a commitment.

Husbands and Wives: Workplace Romance: The New Infidelity

“Marriage, like a relationship with God, works best when it enters every corner of life. Secrecy and infidelity are impossible when we are completely transparent within our marriage. This transparency not only protects our marriage from harm on the outside, it keeps our marriage happiest on the inside.”

This is one view of emotional boundaries in marriage and presents an excellent standard of openness for marriage.

The blame game makes conflict worse. It doesn’t work to point the finger at someone else, cover up one’s own bad choices or make excuses.

This is an excellent website to teach conflict resolution. Everyone finds life hard so take responsibility.

Teaching Children to Be Peacemakers: Teaching Children to Be Peacemakers

Teaching Children to Be Peacemakers: Conflict Is a Slippery Slope

Teaching Children to Be Peacemakers: Conflict Is a Slippery Slope

Teaching Children to Be Peacemakers: Conflict Is an Opportunity

Teaching Children to Be Peacemakers: The Five A’s Can Resolve Conflict

Teaching Children to Be Peacemakers: Forgiveness Is a Choice

Teaching Children to Be Peacemakers: A Respectful Appeal

Teaching Children to Be Peacemakers: What It Takes

TrueU.org | Men’s Hall: Soul Mates or Sole Mates?

In a biblical view, there is not “one right choice” for marriage, but rather good and bad choices. We are encouraged to use wisdom, not destiny, as our guide when choosing a marital partner.

This is a challenging article as it sttes that a soul mate is one who sacrifices for the other. This is true love. It says a woman should repect the Lord and not be selfish. It is tiring in marriage. The woman should not hurt with her words/quarrel but encourage. The search for the one is idoltary.

Husbands and Wives: Romance and Lifelong Intimacy

It is essential to cultivate a sense of romance if intimacy is to flourish in a marriage. But romance between a husband and wife is precarious.

This is a good article as it discribes the different types of romance. It expresses as I have experienced from my husband that pratical romance, for example, loading the dishwasher and taking the girls out once mid-week by the husband fulfills the basic need.

You Can See Better if You Don’t Cover Your Eyes

Rather pray “God, if you intend me for the married life, there must be a Christian man for me, so please lead me to him, and him to me.

This is an O.K. article. It does discuss the best posture for your heart about marriage.

God’s Wardrobe for Successful Dating

A final word of advice: If you’re Instant Messaging with your beau, watch what you write as well. Words, as they say, mean things, and your typed-out words can carry extraordinary power.

This article is good as it discusses the importance of not saying too much to the opposite sex in letters. You tend to say more in letters and it increases connection that does not happen naturally in face to face meetings.

How To Prevent a Bad Date

Is the relationship mostly about one person? A relationship with an “all-about-me” person, even if he’s a hunk and unbelievably popular, is destined to end in disaster either before or after you get to a serious level.

This article offers some good points to consider before committing to a dating relationship.

TrueU.org | Career Services: Egypt

God leads us in the direction of “Egypt” and instead of going we tell Him why we need to stay in our current state of comfortable affairs.

Breakaway Mag

Our vehicle is the Holy Spirit, who transforms us along the journey, preparing us for our destination.

Although this is not the best article it does stress the importance of relying on the Holy Spirit to change us.

Boundless-The Moves

“The first moves are all in your head,” I said. “When you’re enjoying a social activity with a girl, you should admit to yourself that it’s inherently unlike a social activity with a guy friend. Call it what it is: A date.”

This is an excellent article on the conflicting expectation of dating and the respect needed. It underlines the importance of making a choice to date for marriage purposes.

Focus on Your Child: Mistress of the Universe: Learning to Let Go of Control

When your relationship with God is in place, the need to control others will lessen.

This articl is good for tips on how to give lessen control.

Focus on Your Child: Mistress of the Universe: Learning to Let Go of Control

When your relationship with God is in place, the need to control others will lessen.

This articl is good for tips on how to give lessen control.

Myths about Soul Mates

Everyone needs to feel — and be — emotionally safe in marriage — safe in the way you relate to your mate now and safe in the sense that you can count on a future together. The danger lies in expecting an unrealistic level of sublime and safe connection.

TrueU.org | Career Services: Calling & Obedience

he hardest prayer we can pray is, “Lord make me willing to be made willing to do Your will.” Read that again, slowly. It is about our attitude, about doing what God has already told us to do.

The whole article isn’t great. However it does discuss that we should not try to do God’s will on our own.

Focus on the Family Magazine: Not So Happily Ever After

Physically used and emotionally abused, a seemingly God-forgotten Hagar fled to the wilderness — and God found her.

This article is encouraging as it talks about God pursuing us even when we are not even looking for Him. It also stresses God’s challenge to look at family of origin issues. The Lord doesn’t always change others or our circumstances but changes our view.He is the perfecter of our faith if we humbly surrender or experiences in grief.

Focus on the Family Magazine: Not So Happily Ever After

Physically used and emotionally abused, a seemingly God-forgotten Hagar fled to the wilderness — and God found her.

This article is encouraging as it talks about God pursuing us even when we are not even looking for Him. It also stresses God’s challenge to look at family of origin issues. The Lord doesn’t always change others or our circumstances but changes our view.He is the perfecter of our faith if we humbly surrender or experiences in grief.

Ask Theophilus: A Soul is Like a House

And I gave up all hope of life, in the thick sense of “life,” which meant my communion with Him. I also, by the way, became a very repellant person.

I did not find all things about this article great. However it does stress the importance of not abandoning faith which is making happiness god above God.

Family.org — Focus Over Fifty — When It’s Time for a Belief Makeover

And she can’t seem to connect with anyone at church — “everyone is so self-absorbed.” She has all but given up in her quest for personal happiness. Somewhere along the way, Emily traded in hope for despair. The Bible says “Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.” (Proverbs 13:11-13, NIV)

This article discusses the self-fulfilling prophecy of disappointment.

Husbands and Wives: Curse of Codependency

But where is faith? What do we do with God? Fear cancels out faith, and control blocks the power of our prayers.

This article discusses control and specifically showing that we are powerless to change anyone.

Focus Radio – Dominant Emotional Needs

Unconditional love Characteristics include: Feeling closely connected with and deeply cared for by others. Made to feel worthy by others.

This is a great article for anyone who does not feel he/she needs anyone. it is also important to love this way in groups so conflicts are less likely to occur.

Husbands and Wives: What to Expect When You Get Married

This article discusses the importance of not living a single life while married. This is called a kid’s marriage not a healthy one.

Husbands and Wives: Becoming His Beauty

This seduction is more than a sexual thing. It is about becoming the beauty that draws the heart of your man into the oneness God intended for the two of you to have.

This article stresses the importance of having a restful and quiet spirit to draw your husband towards you.

Husbands and Wives: Romance and Lifelong Intimacy

It is essential to cultivate a sense of romance if intimacy is to flourish in a marriage.

This article discusses the importance of romance and some gestures.

Focus on the Family Magazine: Trust: Don’t Leave Home Without It

Trust could be defined as a spouse’s level of confidence that his or her mate is living Philippians 2:4: “Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.”

This article discusses ways to increase trust in marriage.

Focus on your child

When parents go their separate ways, kids experience intense pain. This pain manifests itself in many ways, some easily overlooked and others more subtle.

This article provides specific examples of pain to grieve for children during a separation/divorce.

Focus on your child

Complaints from the three wives ranged from, “I can’t connect with you emotionally” to “I don’t feel like you’re there for me” to “You never care how I feel about anything.” His mom had called him “the man of the house” for as long as he could remember. Why couldn’t his wives?

The article talks about the imapct of separation/divorce on children as it relates to intimacy issues.

Focus on your child

I have saved the hardest item for last. I realized, if I truly wanted peace to abound in my home, I had to forgive my children’s father. Anger and unforgiveness was eating away the peace I needed to be a successful single parent.

This article discusses the importance of forgivng your ex-husband.

Defending “The Cost of Delaying Marriage”

The controversy continues.

This article also discusses ways of discovering if you have the gift of singlesness.

The Cost of Delaying Marriage

This is the initial article that generated the (still ongoing) storm of controversy and has finally forced Boundless to issue a follow-up article defending such. A very interesting read.

Husbands and Wives: Dying to Self to Reclaim Intimacy Jesus died to His own will so that the unloving could love. We are to follow His example and die to self — in order to live.

This article discusses the importance of seeking your spouses happiness and not your own.

Husbands and Wives: After a Fight Think back to some of the worst fights between you and your spouse. If you were able to resolve those arguments by offering and receiving genuine forgiveness, do you remember where that led? Chances are, you soon were enjoying the most enjoyable, and intimate, sex you had experienced in a long time.

This article discusses sex after fighting because of forgiveness.

CitizenLink – Features – Divorce Affects Children’s School Performance “(For) children from intact families, their GPA’s tended to be well over 10 percent higher than those kids who were from divorced or remarried situations,”

This article discusses implications for divorce on children.

I feel too busy for God

Busyness is a definite spiritual killer.

This article discusses ways to reconnect with God.

Craving Crisis “Meaning in life is not found in fulfilling divine purposes, but in a relationship with God.

This article stresses the primary aim in life is to know Christ fully.

The Value of a Family Compass: #4:

Sometimes the very best feedback on parenting comes from the ones we’re trying to parent. Sure, it’s risky, but what better way to open channels of communication with your children?

This is a report card for parents to discuss with their children regarding their mothering/fathering skills.

The Value of a Family Compass: #3:

They have good morals, manners, discipline and a healthy dose of success. They also have questions, struggles, failures and a healthy dose of opposition to what their parents believe. But they continue to believe. They embrace the faith and values modeled by Mom and Dad even when it is unpopular to do so.

This article is an example of suggestions in raising a godly and loving family.

The Value of a Family Compass: #2:

There seems to be three windows of opportunity in the lives of our children for spiritual and values training — the imprint period, the impression period and the coaching period. Each requires a different approach to instruction based upon the developmental stage of the child.

The article discusses the spiritual stages of development of children and guidelines in teaching them.

The Value of a Family Compass: #1:

This article discusses the spiritual values we need to instill in our children.