Session Notes

Overcoming A Bad Family Background – Grace Walk Ministries:::Sharing the Love & Life of Christ:

“Don’t be held captive by your past. It isn’t necessary to pretend your heritage is something other than what it really was, but you don’t have to be held back by it. When Jesus Christ gave you His life, His past became your past. You received a new heritage. The new you has been in Him since the foundation of the world. (See Ephesians 1:4) You aren’t who you used to be. (See 2 Corinthians 5:17) You aren’t the sum of your family’s past. You are who God made you to be – a divine work of art (see Ephesians 2:10), endowed with supernatural potential (see Philippians 4:13). In Christ, your future is as bright as the promises of God! Don’t allow yourself to be trapped by lies which suggest that you’ll never make it in life. You will make it because you have been delivered from your background. Your future hinges on the loving faithfulness of God and He can be trusted. The Psalmist wrote: ‘Your goodness is so great! You have stored up blessings for those who honor you. You have done so much for those who come to you for protection, blessing them before the watching world!’ (Psalm 31:19) “

This is an inspiring article! I pray this article for us, our families, friends, schools, clients, and world.

Sleep Centre – Online Class:

“non-REM Sleep The type of sleep not associated with dreams.  There is some thinking in non-REM sleep but it is usually simple and fragmented.  There are 4 sub-stages to non-REM sleep: Stage 1 sleep:  Is a transition from being awake to being asleep.  Is almost worthless in terms of restorative value.  Although you may be asleep you may also still be partially conscious. Stage 2 sleep:  Deeper than Stage 1 and is thought to aid in body recovery. Stages 3 and 4:  Also called Delta sleep.  Delta sleep is a very deep sleep that is primarily associated with restoration / body recovery. REM Sleep”

Sleep Centre – Online Class:

“Avoid sleeping on your back.  Many people only snore or stop breathing while sleeping on their back.  In such cases, avoidance of this position during sleep reduces both snoring and apnea. There are some simple procedures that can be used to reduce sleeping on your back such as attaching a sock to the back of your nightshirt with 1 or 2 tennis balls. Each time you roll onto your back, the discomfort will prompt you to roll onto your side. In time, you will favor sleeping on your side. Ask your doctor if your sleep study demonstrated whether your sleep apnea occurred only on your back.”

Sleep Centre – Online Class:

“Eat regular meals and a healthy balanced diet. If you feel hungry in the evening, have a light snack or a glass of milk. Heavy meals close to bedtime can result in discomfort and sleep disturbance. Take Calcium 500 mg and Magnesium 250 mg with a light snack to aid in relaxation (mild muscle relaxant). Always check with your doctor before taking a supplement. Above all, don’t try too hard. If you can’t fall asleep, don’t lie in bed anxious and frustrated. If it has been 20 to 30 minutes, leave your bedroom to read, watch TV, or do something else to relax, going back to bed only when you feel sleepy again. If you are a clock-watcher, turn the clock around. Do meditation, yoga or self-hypnosis to help with stress and sleep.”

Sleep Centre – Online Class:

“espiratory Homecare Companies There are several homecare companies within Calgary that we use for our trials of CPAP.  These companies can also perform the same at-home sleep study (SnoreSat) to diagnose obstructive sleep apnea.  You: Need to be referred directly to the company by your family physician. Will be charged for the SnoreSat (approximately $150).  This is the only fee that will be charged.  If you purchase a CPAP machine you would either pay for it yourself or have insurance coverage.  This is no different than if you came to the Sleep Centre. Results will be interpreted by a sleep specialist but you do not see the specialist. Family doctor discusses the results with you and gets you on the appropriate therapy (CPAP, dental appliance, urgent referral to the Sleep Centre…) The companies are likely able to do this testing within 2 weeks.  Once you follow-up with your family physician they are also able to get you onto CPAP therapy within a couple of weeks. This is a very quick, safe approach for many patients to be assessed for obstructive sleep apnea.  ”

Sleep Centre – Online Class:

“Private Sleep Clinics There are 2 private sleep clinics in Calgary that can diagnose and treat any sleep disorder.  The following table compares both clinics: Updated April 14, 2008 Canadian Sleep Institute Centre for Sleep and Human Performance Referral from family physician required? Yes Yes Fees for at-home sleep study Yes Yes Fees for polysomnography (in-clinic sleep study) Yes Yes   At both clinics the sleep specialist will discuss your results and follow-up your treatment progress.  The main advantage to going to the private clinics is that they have a shorter waitlist than the Sleep Centre.  There may be fees associated with each clinic visit.”

‘Superfoods’ Everyone Needs:

“Top Superfoods Offering Super Health Protection Beans Blueberries Broccoli Oats Oranges Pumpkin Salmon Soy Spinach Tea (green or black) Tomatoes Turkey Walnuts Yogurt”

I have also heard that guacomole, flax seed, and dark chocolate are included.

Babies born to women who suffered morning sickness may be smarter:

“‘They can be dehydrated, they cannot work. Poor quality of life. So in a way this study further supports them and empowers them to treat themselves.’ Koren and colleagues wanted to look at whether there were any signs that using diclectin during pregnancy was harmful. The drug has been on the market in Canada for decades, but was pulled from production in the U.S. about 25 years ago over concerns it might be harmful to fetuses. It is being reintroduced in that market. The concerns, which came to light after the thalidomide scandal, led to the drug being extensively studied, said Dr. Tina Chambers, a teratologist at the University of California, San Diego’s School of Medicine. Teratology is the study of abnormal fetal development, congenital malformations and what causes them.”

This is a very reassuring article that the med has been safe for a least 10 yrs. Nausea is actually a sign of a healthy pregnancy. God seems to say so as well. Isn’t it great that technology can even reassure you if it is even possible to become pregnant. Now women can really wait for His best timing for marriage/family!

6 Reasons to Drink Green Tea:

“6 Reasons to Drink Green Tea The steady stream of good news about green tea is getting so hard to ignore, that even java junkies are beginning to sip mugs of the deceptively delicate brew. You’d think the daily dose of disease-fighting, inflammation-squelching antioxidants — long linked with heart protection — would be enough incentive. But wait . . . there’s more! Lots more. “

GV Jan 2008:

“Control freaks – that’s what we all are when we try to be in charge of our own lives. God never intended for us to be in control. Controlling things is His role, not ours. ‘My life is out of control!’ people have tearfully said to me at times in the counseling office. What they really meant was ‘My life is out of my control and I don’t like it!’             Imagine a baby holding a pair of new shoes in his hands. He is playing with them and happy they belong to him. His parent reaches down to take the shoes and put them on the child’s feet. All the child sees is that his shoes are being taken out of his hands. He doesn’t like it. He wants to control them and keep them in his hands, but he will never walk in them that way.             The parent takes the shoes from the hand of the child and the baby begins to cry. He is overwhelmed with anger, confusion and regret that his shoes are being taken from him. He screams. He kicks in protest. He is losing control of the thing he loves and wants to hold. He doesn’t understand what his parent is doing. But the parent understands and does what is necessary to enable the child to walk – whether the child likes it or even understands.             The goal is to enable the child to enjoy the shoes to the fullest by walking in them. The parent knows that if the shoes are used for their designed purpose, the child will truly benefit and not simply be amused by them.             Only a baby thinks the highest pleasure is to hold them in his hands. He doesn’t see the whole picture. So the parent overrules the baby’s wishes and does what is needful. Eventually the child will understand. When he does, he is thrilled, and more important than that, he walks. Do you want to walk? What are you holding onto that you need to release? Let it go. God knows what He is doing.”

This is an excellent article for parenting and dealing with the crisies of life. I pray for this rest and openness to genuinely let go of our way after working through the emotions individually/together with others.

St. Petersburg Times

Calling it a way to “open the door for dialogue” between the resort and its homeowners, Anne Hathorn, of the Clearwater firm of Becker & Poliakoff, said the resort must cut off ties with Web sites that promote the swinger lifestyle, tighten control on the use of Caliente’s name in event advertisements and where the ads are distributed, and get Caliente reinstated in the American Association for Nude Recreation.

Caliente Resort said it plans to keep on marketing to those it calls “nontraditional nudists.”

Caliente was embroiled in controversy last month when the association temporarily suspended its membership and opened an investigation into sexually charged monthly parties at Caliente organized by Aahz Party Lifestyle Group, a “lifestyle,” or swingers, group with Caliente’s blessing.

The association promotes family-friendly nudism. Its investigation puts at stake Caliente’s access to marketing assistance and membership subsidies for tourists, among other advantages.

Here’s one for the category of ironic parallelism…

They come there looking for freedom, a chance to throw off the oppressive constraints of society and run free in their (largely) wrinkled, middle-aged birthday suits — “just as God intended it.”

Then they create a complicated series of rules and regulations for what constitutes appropriate freedom, a homeowners association to back it and retain a lawyer to enforce their definitions of freedom… It seems oppression follows wherever rule-keeper type people are…

Sounds a lot like Evangelical Christianity doesn’t it??? We too set out to create a place supposedly based based on grace with its calling of freeing people from the bondage to law and judgment that has trapped them in that which formerly was (A system of law, sin and death) and unable to breath free.

Then we create a place sanctioned by Revenue Canada, governed by a federally approved charter, led by a talking head (we misname a pastor), controlled by an elected board issuing edicts (which we misname the elders) and managed by staff people (often misnamed the deacons) hired under their agreement to uphold a code of conduct and do what that board tells them to do. We preach a gospel of performance and moralizing and flood people with good-works systems and, “Opportunities,” to perform such in to prove that they really belong — and guilt them into doing such.

And, then we wonder why it becomes a place of fear, shame and the bondage of a tiny minority’s control with people living in the exact opposite of what Jesus came to bring.

And, worst of all, we do so because we can’t believe that Jesus/the Gospel has any real power. We can’t believe that setting people free will unleash love and community — not selfishness. We can’t believe that preaching real grace (Not the performance based version) will draw people to heal — not to wreak the lives of others. We can’t believe that creating a church where the broken messes of our lives are spilling out all over the place (where everyone is ok with those messes being there) and relying on God to heal them (Rather then using judgment based performance to fix it) could actually create a church where it is safe to be — not a haven for abusers. We can’t even fathom that the absence of structure could actually inspire creativity — not anarchy.

We can’t — because, if we’re honest with ourselves, we don’t really believe that Jesus is real or that He can heal. So, we’ve created our own systems. Surprise surprise, they suck.

Q&A: How do I allow Christ to live thru me?:

“”I was trying.“ Through repeated attempts, I was failing again and again. >>>I don’t think we ever really get to an end of our ”trying“, but our Father builds within us a quicker recognition of these vain attempts. It’s cool to find yourself thinking, ”Been there, done that!“ as you become more and more convinced that everything else is futile, except Christ … who is in us.”

This is a very good article regarding focusing on thanking God for giving us continued insights. this is to cause us to recognize the difference between trying and God’s doing in us. It is also a good discussion on the desires we have within us to please/love our parents and God. The fact God loves you has also been embedded in us.

Active Learning:

“atthew 4:1-11 with your family. Consider these questions:How did Satan try to deceive Jesus like commercials try to trick you?How did Jesus deal with the temptation to have more ”stuff“?What can we learn from this story about temptation?Now read Hebrew 13:5; talk about what it means to want more things. Remind everyone that God has promised to take care of our needs. Ask each family member to complete the following sentence: ”One way I can be happy with what I have is to …“”

This is a good series of articles on dealing with the feelings of temptation. However one does not need to apply it. I believe one needs to pray in a position of victory that God will live out His way in handling the issue when we ask.

For Mothers at Home:

“Setting expectations too high. If we don’t accept that life with children will include disorder, we will stay frustrated because we feel out of control.Forgetting how to have fun. Do you believe that now that you are an adult you can’t be silly anymore? Even as adults, we can still have slumber parties with our girlfriends, Chinese fire drills and pillow fights.”

calgary.ctv.ca – Calgary news from CTV:

“ ”Eight millimeter films shot in the 50’s and 60’s are reaching the end of their shelf life, even if they’ve been stored in optimal storage conditions.“

Videos also do not hold up to time and begin to degrade in as little as 15 years.

Consumer Reports says if you have working playback equipment for your original video, you can buy a DVD recorder and transfer the videos yourself.

”Take your playback device such as your camcorder, and plug in the DVD recorder cable. Press play on your camcorder/playback device. Press record on the DVD recorder, and you’re all set,“ says Langehennig.

When it comes to films you need to hire a service to do the transfer.

An average price for the service is around $50 for the first 15 minutes.”

Live with Regis and Kelly – Green Week on LIVE:

“CLEAN & DISINFECT TILE, FLOOR, SHOWER, ETC.

Mix two tablespoons Borax, a little lemon juice & hot water and pour into a spray bottle
Borax disinfects as well as fighting mold & mildew
Citrus, like lemon is a natural acidic cleanser and is great for mineral build-up”

How Can I Cut My Spouse’s Apron Strings?:

“ Talk about how the two of you would like decision making to work. Would you prefer that the two of you make choices without getting input from either set of parents? Are there some decisions you’d ask one set of parents about, but not the other? Be aware that asking for parents’ advice can be a slippery slope. It may leave them feeling the door is open for them to give you input into other areas, or even to ”correct“ decisions you’ve already made. Credit each other and your in-laws with goodwill toward your marriage”

This is a good article, with the exception where it does not acknowledge conflicts with believers needs to be handled differently. If both couples believe in Jesus’ risenness one needs to approach them as no one party is “right.” Both have the Lord living out His righteousness in them. I like the point that one makes changes themselves and discuss it, if the issue is risen by the other party. This is according to the God’s leading.

How to Treat Food Poisoning – eHow.com :

“You can use over-the-counter medications to control vomiting or diarrhea, but it is usually better not to use anything for at least the first 6 or 8 hours. The bacteria or virus causing the problem will pass from your body faster if you don’t try to slow it down.”

How to Embrace Your Messiness – weHow.com :

“ Collecting can be fun and rewarding, financially and otherwise. So if you feel a particular object or set of objects is important or reminds you of a meaningful time or event in your life, don’t feel guilty about keeping it around. It brings you joy. So what’s wrong with that?”

Shovel Writings: Too Much Jesus?:

“So … how much Jesus is too much? What do you think? Now, it’s often said that too much grace will lead to sin, but what in the heck does that mean? Oh, we have adopted this cute little word called, licentiousness, which reminds us that too much of a good thing is bad for you … but do we really know what we’re talking about? Don’t we know that we have demanded that too much Jesus is bad? I don’t know about you, but that don’t sound right!! Yeah, yeah, we can play the word games, but the too much grace we refer to is the same that comes through Jesus.”

This is a good point. We need to understand that even though some have a fear that too much grace will lead to sin. Fear is not of God.

When Your Kids Divorce:

“For example, what about your child moving back home? Some counselors caution parents about the implications that come with putting out either a ”Vacancy“ or ”No Vacancy“ sign. Perhaps your child should explore other options, such as moving into a smaller apartment or taking on tenants, instead of returning home. How much financial or material support can/should you offer? Consider conditions on your help, such as whether your giving should be a gift or a loan, and for how long. Other legal and financial questions must also be considered, such as your will and raising grandchildren, directly or indirectly, if the need arises.”

This article focuses on adult children of divorce. It stresses blaming, especially of childcare decisions makes reconciliation difficult.

Plenty of Men to Go Around, Part 2 :

“the older have a vital role to play in helping them marry well.”

This is a good article on the importance of older women who are a rich resource with a wealth of life, wisdom, spiritual guidance, and dispassionate objectivity to encourage women. there is also an enlightening survey of where to meet men.

BA: How Important is a Parental Blessing? :

“I know three years sounds like a long time, but it’s not forever. Jacob worked seven years before marrying Rachel. The worse case scenario may be that you wait. If marriage is meant to be, it will still make sense in three years, and the rest of your life together is a long time.”

This is a good article regarding waiting for God’s timing. Jacob waited 7 years for Rachel. However the justification part about attitudes seems to be another Christianized version of living by the law.

Husbands and Wives: Why Isn’t Marriage the Way I Thought It Would Be?:

“Tom’s expectations about marriage weren’t being met. Through reading and counseling he finally recognized that those expectations were an effort to cope with a painful childhood. Growing up, he’d often been under his mother’s controlling thumb. He’d brought into marriage a vow that he’d never get close enough to his wife to let her control him as Mom had. As a result, he’d never gotten close enough to truly connect with Jill. Tom had to work through his hurts before he could begin to relate to Jill in a more meaningful way. The two of them met periodically over coffee with a seasoned couple in their church, learning what they might expect in each new stage of marriage. They still have struggles. But Tom is learning more about God’s expectations for their marriage. Unless he depends on God for the ability to love Jill, he doesn’t have a prayer to make it happen. He’s also learning that by staying true to his marriage, he’s growing in ways he never thought possible.”

This is a good explanation of the importance of grieving through family of origin issues and surrendering vows. I disagree that we grow. It is God’s work of loving others through us that produces the so called growth.

SFGATE.COM

“The preponderance of research clearly shows that homework for elementary students does not make a difference in student achievement. It is hard to believe that a strategy used so extensively has no foundation,” principal David Ackerman of Oak Knoll Elementary in Menlo Park wrote in a letter to parents this autumn as he put the brakes on homework.

Two new books read like manifestos against what authors consider an avalanche of unproductive take-home assignments. Their titles lay their beliefs on the line: the research critique “The Homework Myth: Why Our Kids Get Too Much of a Bad Thing” by Alfie Kohn, and the more anecdotal “The Case Against Homework: How Homework is Hurting Our Children and What We Can Do About It” by Sara Bennett and Nancy Kalish.

At the same time, an international comparison by two Penn State professors has concluded that junior high students who scored highest in math tended to come from countries where teachers assign relatively little homework — including Denmark, the Czech Republic and (take note) Japan. Conversely, the lowest-scoring students came from countries where teachers assign tons of homework, such as Iran, Thailand and Greece.

“It almost seems as though the more homework a nation’s teachers assign, the worse the nation’s students do,” concluded researchers Gerald LeTendre and David Baker, who found Americans in the mid-range in the amount of homework assigned and in achievement.

Someone finally had to say it.

With 6 hours of classtime per day for 180 days per year for 12 years, we cannot teach our children what they need to know? We need higher expectations for our teachers — not more busy work for our students.

Perhaps canceling classes on what and who to have sex with may be a start at freeing up time for learning things that actually matter — like skateboarding and building tree forts?

How to Organize Your Chores – eHow.com:

“FREQUENCYCHORESDailyLoad and unload the dishwasher or wash dishes.Nuke the sponge for 30 seconds to kill germs.Wipe down and disinfect countertops and stovetop.Move newspapers and magazines to recycling area.Put toys and games away.Return clothes to closets and throw dirty clothes in the laundry baskets.Make the beds.”

Husbands and Wives: Life Insurance Mistakes (Part 2 of 2):

“I have compiled, for your life insurance reading pleasure, 10 easy-to-understand life insurance mistakes and how to avoid them. Mistake 1: Buying life insurance as an investment. Life insurance is designed to replace your income stream if you die so that your dependents will be able to maintain a normal standard of living in your absence for a reasonable period of time until they can change their lives to fit their new economic circumstances. Life insurance is not designed to fund your retirement or pay for your kids’ college educations. The single worst reason to buy life insurance is as an investment or a forced savings plan. Insurance companies have a great reputation as insurers but as investors they are anything but sterling. That means the only kind of life insurance you should consider is term. Forget about anything with whole, universal, or variable life in the title. It makes for great marketing brochures and fancy graphs but cannot measure up as a great investment when put to the test.”

Are Christian Fathers Better Fathers?: :

“evangelical dads spent more time with children playing, helping with homework and talking. They ate an average of 27 more meals a year with their children and were more likely to coach youth sports or lead youth activities. ‘Evangelical Protestant fathers are very involved with their children, which I found surprising, given their tendency to embrace traditional gender attitudes,’ Wilcox noted. So how can you defy society’s expectations and become an even better dad than you already are? -Watch a favorite TV show with your child. Ask him about the characters and storyline. This is a simple way to enter your child’s world and recognize other influences that affect the way he thinks. -Take your son or daughter to a restaurant you both like. Share favorite things and talk one-on-one without the competing demands of other siblings, phone calls or TV. - Keep reading. Even tweens will enjoy reading a book aloud with you. -Include children in projects. Ask them to help you string the Christmas lights, paint the basement or change the oil in the car. The teaching, connecting and fun will be invaluable.”

Part of me wonders if this list is realistic. Can God, then the spouse be kept as higher priority

Answer:

“Husbands and wives who fill their lives with never-ending volumes of work are too exhausted to take walks together, to share their deeper feelings, to understand and meet each other’s needs. This breathless pace predominates in millions of households, leaving every member of the family frazzled and irritable. Husbands are moonlighting to bring home more money. Wives are on their own busy career track. Their children are often ignored, and life goes speeding by in a deadly routine. Even some grandparents are too busy to keep the grandkids. I see this kind of overcommitment as the quickest route to the destruction of the family.”

Family.org: Pregnancy Resource Ministry: “For a time, Heather regretted telling anyone. ‘I felt my whole identity had changed. Heather the worship leader was now Heather, the one who had been raped.’ She couldn’t bear seeing people who knew her story, so she hid at home, embarrassed, isolated and alone. ‘But they [the community] loved me anyway,’ Heather said. Their care for my family was tangible, and they loved us so much that there wasn’t room in my heart for bitterness and shame. You can’t hold love and shame in your heart simultaneously.’ Just Love As the months passed and Heather’s baby grew, so did her enthusiasm. Heather went shopping and bought clothes for herself as well as the necessary baby items. With the experience was no longer tainted by painful memories. ‘It was a beautiful moment of receiving a new life,’ Heather said. The only emotion left was love. Rachel is now a bubbly and energetic 9-year-old. She’s Daddy’s girl, and Steve is enthralled by her. There have been moments when he has looked at Heather and asked, ‘Can you imagine if we would have never had a daughter?’”

What scripture really says about the role of women in marriage

Excerpt:
For centuries, the church has been telling women that their role is to do what their husbands want and, if their husbands happen to be Godly, they will like it.

It’s time the church woke up and realized that if we are to continue demanding that women do everything men say as our definition of submission, then we also have to demand that people abandon their labor unions to do everything their employers say and bow to atrocities like abortion or mass murder that governments are perpetrating.

Jesus came to set us free from the bondage we were all under and part of that bondage was the war of power and control that is on between men and woman. He came to set men free to be the powerful, relationally initiatory and passionate beings they were created to be and for women to finally again stand as the beautiful, relationally responsive and powerful life giving beings they were created to be.

He is still calling us to be like the radical cultural revolutionary He was – not to be puppets. He came to tell us that the greatest among us was to be the servant of all. He came to teach us to love – not to avoid or to control. He came to declare war on injustice, on oppression, on the legalistic control that had enslaved His people and destroyed their hearts. He came to set the captives free to be fully human and fully alive. That applies equally to both men and women.

I just wonder if we in the church will ever stop shooting at each other long enough to stand side by side as sons and daughters of the Most High King and finally mobilize for the real war for the hearts and souls of the world.

Stuff and Nonsense: Stuff and Nonsense

But to give up Christmas gift giving altogether would be nonsense. Here’s why: Gift giving can help my children capture the essence of God’s extravagant love for us. The planning, the decorations, the music, the wonder of Christmas — including the unwrapping of gifts — show my children about abundant generosity. As a family we can celebrate the goodness of God — the pinnacle good being the giving of the Christ child. If approached with the right attitude, Christmas American-style can still be holy.

Having “the right attitude” is the tricky part, but we’re working on it.

Taylor’s list has exactly five items on it, all of which are electronics I have banned and refuse to purchase. This makes me sad for two reasons: First, he will probably be disappointed with what I buy. But maybe that’s okay, because ultimately all material things will disappoint him — and the sooner he learns to seek after the true Gift of God, the better.

Have a Razzle-Dazzle Christmas on a Rinky-Dink Budget

String white lights around the house and light candles; dim your overhead lights to create a cozy feel.

Nurturing Your Child’s Spirit: Build a Foundation

As they take in the world around them, they learn that bad things happen to good people and wonder why. Why does grandmother have cancer? Why did my neighbor get into a car crash? Why do people in faraway places not have enough food to eat? They wonder how they can make things better. They have an abundance of “childlike faith,” so they believe they can. If the concept of God is introduced properly by loving parents, they don’t need to know all about who God is or where He’s from. They simply trust that He is there, aware, and cares. Pointing in the Right Direction There will come a time when your child’s faith will become personal.

Nurturing Your Child’s Spirit: What Is a Healthy Faith Tradition?

What Is a Healthy Faith Tradition?

  It is one that:

Gives us a clear understanding of who God is and why we are here. Gives us a purpose for our life that’s bigger than ourselves Provides a sense of security with self and others Gives emotional stability in adversity Helps us understand society, the good and bad Provides social skills for healthy relationships, especially within the family Teaches us respect for others

Nurturing Your Child’s Spirit: Assessing Childhood Faith Things to assess about your belief system:

God: Does God exist? If so, is he all-powerful? All knowing? All good?

Man: Is man created in the image of God? Did he evolve, like an animal? Or was he created higher than animals?

Sin: What does the word mean? Is sin real? What makes something sin? If there is sin, what do you do about it? Are there consequences to sin?

Afterlife: What is your view of eternity? Heaven? Hell?

Salvation: If sin and eternity exist, how do we resolve this? How do we find salvation? Is it through good works? Is it through God? Are there other ways?

Truth: What is truth? How do you know something is true?

Society: What is our responsibility to others? What is our role in society?

Nurturing Your Child’s Spirit: The Value of Traditions Easter sunrise service: Most communities have a sunrise service that can help make this season special.

A special meal with guests or doing a service project can teach children that others are valuable.

The opportunity to nurture your child’s spirit and the powerful sense of identity that traditions bring to children’s lives are well worth the work you put into developing your own special family traditions. Start now and reap the rewards.

Smart Stepparenting: Recognize the Losses of Your Stepchildren

Here are just a few changes that bring loss to children:

not wanting parents to divorcenot wanting to change residences or move between two homes a new stepparent they didn’t ask for and the death of the dream of parental reconciliationnew stepsiblings

Smart Stepparenting: Key Points to Remember

Early in remarriage biological parents need to remain primary caregivers and disciplinarians. Handing off the children to the new stepparent sabotages his or her ability to build a relationship. • Early in remarriage parents should empower stepparents by communicating to the children their expectation of obedience. Later, even if you disagree with what the stepparent has done in your absence, support his or her position with the children. Then take your disagreement behind closed doors and work out a unified plan and consequences for the next offense.

Smart Stepparenting: Make Your Marriage a Priority

f the biological parent doesn’t help the stepparent into a leadership position, the stepparent is likely to try to force his or her way in. This almost always results in resentment and resistance from the insiders. Again, jealousy, rejection, and anger are common resulting emotions.

Now let me balance this truth by noting that biological parents must take a “both/and” stance with their children and new spouse. They must invest time and energy in both. Early in the remarriage, for example, it is especially important to stay connected with your children. But eventually the marriage must be made a priority, even in front of the children.

Smart Stepparenting: Move Gradually into Discipline

Biological parents must pass power to stepparents shortly after remarriage so that children will understand that stepparents are not acting on their own authority, but on the parent’s authority. You might say, “I know Sarah is not your mother. However, when I am not here, she will be enforcing the rules we have all agreed on. I expect you to be courteous and respect her as you would a teacher or coach.

Smart Stepparenting: Grow into Your Role

Early in remarriage, the most successful stepparent-stepchild relationships are those where the stepparent focuses first on the development of a warm, friendly interaction style with the stepchild. Once a foundation of mutual respect and affection is established, stepparents who then attempt to assume a disciplinarian role are less likely to meet with resentment from the stepchild.”1

Smart Stepparenting: Have Realistic Expectations

Stepparents need to learn to relax into their role and not expect too much of themselves. To expect too much is to set themselves up for disappointment and frustration. Biological parents also need to relax and let stepparents and stepchildren carve out their relationship.

James Bray discovered that most stepchildren in the early years of stepfamily life view the stepparent like a coach or camp counselor.2 Such people have limited authority with children and provide instruction, but they are not “parents.”

Smart Stepparenting: Have Realistic Expectations

Stepparents need to learn to relax into their role and not expect too much of themselves. To expect too much is to set themselves up for disappointment and frustration. Biological parents also need to relax and let stepparents and stepchildren carve out their relationship.

James Bray discovered that most stepchildren in the early years of stepfamily life view the stepparent like a coach or camp counselor.2 Such people have limited authority with children and provide instruction, but they are not “parents.”

Smart Stepparenting: Enjoy the Relationship You Have Now

The cardinal rule for stepparent bonding is to let the children set the pace for their relationship with you.

If they welcome or seek affection, then go for it. If they remain distant and cordial, honor that as well. If they follow your rules and respect your decisions, continue to assert your given authority.

TrueU.org | Student Lounge: Home for the Holidays

Your hope that they will treat you as a grown-up is entirely legit — but it’s also understandable that many parents have trouble making the shift. And, let’s face it, you’re staying under their roof and it’s within their prerogative to ask you not to come and go at all hours of the night.

Clubhouse Magazine

This is the story of the birth of Jesus Christ — the fulfillment of the words God spoke through the prophets. Prophet (reading from scroll): A young girl will have a Son and He will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace .

Family.org — Focus Over Fifty — Obesity: Battling the Middle-age Spread

First is the emotional and spiritual component. Researchers have found that the root cause of overeating is an the attempt to meet emotional needs such as unconditional love, significance and security.

Cognitively, food feels like it nurtures us, giving us a sense of control, and a false belief that we are not being deprived. This pseudo-comfort dissipates as soon as we consume our fill of food, often leaving us feeling unloved, out of control and empty. Obviously eating is not the solution for emotional starvation; Christ is our answer.

Begin all lifestyle changes with prayer. Whenever you feel the urge to eat and you know you’re not hungry, seek God’s comfort. Pray and ask Him to show you clearly the difference between emotional and physical hunger, and act accordingly. Keeping a prayer journal. Expressing your emotions freely may help you let them go and turn them over to God.

The Family Christmas Tree:

Cheer as a family when the tree is lit. Close the evening in prayer and thanks.

Little traditions like these will encourage warmth, togetherness, and stability in your family.

The Family Christmas Tree:

Cheer as a family when the tree is lit. Close the evening in prayer and thanks.

Little traditions like these will encourage warmth in your family.

Neglect ‘leaves a physical mark’

Study suggests that the primary effects of neglect are found in their ability to prevent a child’s ability to bond.

Preparing for Adolescence: Family Mealtimes Decrease Teen Rebellion

She found that dinnertime was of more value to child development than playtime, school and story time. Clearly, there is power in “breaking bread” together.

Teens need to eat with their families 5x a week.

Why Kids Need Their Grandparents:

Every child needs a grandmother and grandfather — a person who is older, wiser and willing to hold his or her life up as an example of faith. A person who forgives and teaches forgiveness. A person whose abundance of faith will be there in sufficient supply when children need it. Because sooner or later children need more faith than what they possess.

Reaching Out at Christmastime: Tips for Hosting a Christmas Coffee

Think through the personal story you will share that night. The goal is not to preach to neighbors but to let them know a little about you personally and why Christmas is meaningful to you.

Focus on the Family Magazine: Standing in the Gap

My son was just 5 years old when his father and I separated, and my son was very angry. He had been witness to two prior separations and audience to the disintegration of our relationship.

This is a great article to pour out anger/sadness to God about wanting a real parent.

The Benefits of Family Hobbies: Why Family Identity Matters

My friend with the grown kids says they remember their outdoor adventures as an antidote to the teen culture. Looking back they say, “We were never tempted to drugs or drinking because we had tasted the high of nature and the mountains, in the context of family love.”

It offers excellent points to foster family bonding.

Focus on the Family Magazine: Not So Happily Ever After

Physically used and emotionally abused, a seemingly God-forgotten Hagar fled to the wilderness — and God found her.

This article is encouraging as it talks about God pursuing us even when we are not even looking for Him. It also stresses God’s challenge to look at family of origin issues. The Lord doesn’t always change others or our circumstances but changes our view.He is the perfecter of our faith if we humbly surrender or experiences in grief.

Focus on your child

I have saved the hardest item for last. I realized, if I truly wanted peace to abound in my home, I had to forgive my children’s father. Anger and unforgiveness was eating away the peace I needed to be a successful single parent.

This article discusses the importance of forgivng your ex-husband.